‘The Big Bang Theory’ Never Answered This Burning Question About Howard

Throughout the hit sitcom, The Big Bang Theory, Howard Wolowitz’s relationship with his mother remains one of the most distinctive and exaggerated portrayals of a parent-child relationship on television. Frequently heard but never actually seen on screen, Mrs. Wolowitz exerts an almost omnipresent influence over her son’s life, micromanaging everything from Howard’s meals to his hygiene well into adulthood. Their relationship is defined by a striking level of codependency, with Howard often infantilized despite his advanced education and achievements.

However, this characterization also creates one specific narrative inconsistency that is difficult to ignore. Despite being portrayed as deeply attached to his mother, the series establishes that Howard completed his engineering degree at Massachusetts Institute of Technology, an institution located thousands of miles from his home in Pasadena, California. For a character whose mother reacts with dramatic hysteria at the idea of him being separated from her, evidenced by her reaction to his space journey, the notion that Mrs. Wolowitz allowed her son to move across the country without protest raises questions that The Big Bang Theory never addresses.

Mrs. Wolowitz Is Heavily Dependent on Howard in ‘The Big Bang Theory’

One of the most persistent comedic traits in The Big Bang Theory is Mrs. Wolowitz’s tendency to yell for Howard from another room, demanding his presence for everyday tasks such as eating, dressing, or retrieving items. This constant proximity between the duo suggests that Howard remained under his mother’s watchful eye for the majority of his adult life. Within that context, the idea that he lived independently at MIT for several years while completing his studies appears inconsistent with the show’s portrayal of their bond.

The Big Bang Theory does not provide any flashbacks, anecdotes, or emotional recollections that explain Howard’s time at MIT and how his relationship with his mother withstood the distance. It is unclear whether he resided in student housing, returned home during breaks, or maintained contact with her during those years. Without these details, the show leads viewers to assume that this highly dependent mother-son relationship could withstand long-term geographic separation, despite how implausible it may seem.

A simple narrative device, such as a flashback or passing comment about their arrangement during college, would have undoubtedly provided much-needed context. This could have clarified whether Mrs. Wolowitz remained a vital part of Howard’s life away from home through frequent visits or phone calls, or whether she was completely alienated during that period of time. However, The Big Bang Theory does not offer any clarification, and so, the status of Howard’s relationship with his mother during those years remains anyone’s guess.

Did Mrs. Wolowitz Move With Howard?

Another plausible explanation for the gap in Howard’s backstory lies in the possibility that Mrs. Wolowitz temporarily relocated with Howard. This would have allowed her to be close to her son even while he attended MIT. This theory, albeit speculative, provides a logical workaround for maintaining their co-dependent relationship during Howard’s college years.

Fan discussions have occasionally entertained this possibility. Some speculate that Howard may have lived with extended family or maintained a frequent travel schedule between Massachusetts and California during his breaks from university. Others have imagined scenarios where Howard’s mother insisted on regular visits or established her presence in his life through incessant telephone communication. Yet, these speculations remain simply that, with no confirmation from the show’s creators.

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Given how much comedic material the writers derived from Mrs. Wolowitz’s possessiveness, this omission is a missed opportunity that would have allowed the show’s creators to bring in more humor to the sitcom by delving deeper into the nuances of the relationship between Howard and his mother. If the writers had chosen to incorporate even a brief reference, it would have likely enhanced both character consistency and narrative believability. Instead, the decision to have the narrative skip over these years entirely leaves audiences to reconcile the contradiction between Howard’s independence during his college years and his later dependence as an adult.

College Anxiety Should Have Come Up During Howard’s Space Mission in ‘The Big Bang Theory’

Howard’s space mission at the end of Season 5 is depicted as a major turning point in his relationship with his mother. Her emotional turmoil, voiced through dramatic conversation and exaggerated reactions, underscores her deep attachment to Howard and crushing anxiety over his physical absence. The storyline effectively portrays the heightened dependency Mrs. Wolowitz has on her son, yet raises an important question. If Howard has already lived quite some distance away during his college years, why is this current separation treated as unprecedented? Or, did the separation during college make Mrs. Wolowitz all the more anxious and overbearing?

The absence of any mention of past distance or earlier separation challenges the show’s depiction of the duo’s emotional relationship. If Howard’s time at MIT previously strained their relationship, it would have provided a meaningful precedent for the emotional dynamics seen during the time leading up to the space mission. Instead, the show presents the mission as their first major test of long-distance interaction, somewhat undermining the believability of their bond.

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Spanning over a decade, The Big Bang Theory rose to fame for delivering character-driven humor that was often grounded in exaggerated yet relatable human behavior, and Howard Wolowtiz’s dynamic with his mother was one of the show’s most iconic examples of this approach. Yet, the series fails to account for a critical period in Howard’s life, which, by all indications, should have been a significant challenge to their deeply interwoven lives. A few well-placed lines or brief flashbacks could have offered valuable clarity and cohesion. However, as it stands, the question of how Howard managed to attend MIT while maintaining such a close bond with his mother remains one of the show’s most perplexing unanswered questions.